Friday, October 12, 2012

Changing my Mind

I'm 35 weeks and 4 days today and I've changed my mind about how I'm going to have this baby.  I was booked in to have a c-section on the 9th of November, but I've decided it's not for me.

I had an elective caesar with Max at my Ob's recommendation. At 36 weeks he decided that Max was going to be quite big and because my pelvis is slightly tilted at a funny angle there was a 'good chance' his shoulders would get stuck and I would end up having an emergency c-section anyway. I have no regrets at all about Max's birth, it was actually exactly what I wanted at the time. Well planned, organised and structured. The only thing that didn't go to plan was Max needing to go off to the nicu for 8 hours because he wasn't breathing well - you can read Max's birth story here.

Sean, Max and Me - December 2009


Max ended up being 8 pounds (at 38 weeks) and I really don't think he was as big as anyone expected. This time round the baby is measuring quite big again, and although I've only put on 3 kilos (I had plenty of spare ones to start with), my belly is enormous. But I was like that with Max too and like I said he really wasn't very big.

At my 20 week appointment the obstetrician  I saw asked if I wanted to have a caesar or a vbac and I said that I hadn't decided yet. He then kept reading my file and after seeing I had MS said 'you're having a caesar'. At the time I just excepted it as I had always thought that's what would happen anyway.

I've had a fairly textbook pregnancy and except for a week back in July my MS symptoms have been mostly under control. I'm fatigued a lot of the time, but tell me about a 35 week pregnant mum of a toddler who isn't! Two nights ago I woke up in the middle of the night and just knew that I didn't want another c-section. I almost woke Sean up to tell him, but decided to wait until the morning. We had a good chat about it and he's happy with my choice.

I saw my Dr yesterday and she is backing me up too. So next Tuesday I'm going up to the hospital to meet with an Ob and have my plan changed. I'm fully aware that I could end up having a c-section anyway, but I really want to give it a shot. This is probably going to be my last baby and I want to know what it feels like to go into labour, I want to feel the contractions and I want to give birth to my baby. I'll probably regret all of that as soon as it starts, but that's how I feel right at this moment.

Wish me luck :)